You guys. You. Guys. It’s over. Done. Finished. Finito. Caput. I am a college graduate.
A completely unconventional college graduate, but I did it.
I began college fresh out of high school, ten years ago. I went full time for ~2 years and then took a break. I felt like a failure.* I felt like a drop out. I technically was a drop out. Three years passed and I went back. This time, part-time while working full-time. FIVE YEARS of that (summers included!)…and I’m done. The longest break I have had was the first summer when I didn’t take classes. 14 weeks. That’s it. Now I’m going to have a break for 14 years!
It feels impossible. It feels like I should be gearing up for summer classes. It feels like I should be scouting amazon for my fall books. But I’m not. I am done. I’m not registered for any more classes. I did not fill out a FAFSA. I did my student loan exit counseling.
I am done.
The past 5 years were hard. They were trying. It was the most stressful time of my life.
But I’m done! I did not attend graduation because I don’t know anyone else graduating and I didn’t want to sit alone. I also didn’t want to buy a cap and gown. Instead, I took the money I would have spent on the cap and gown and treated myself to a hot stone massage and it was the best decision I have ever made. I need another one, right now. I also treated Keith to a regular massage for putting up with my schooling for the past 5 years. Lots of dinners alone and hanging out alone while I did homework and I’ve missed at least 4 of his birthdays due to being in class. But no more!!!
(Although grades don’t come out until Thursday so I’m terrified that I somehow failed. If I fail my GIS class, fine, no biggie. But if I fail my Anthro class, I cannot graduate.**)
*College is not for everyone. If you dropped out, you are not a failure. My dropping out would not have made me a failure, but I am insane, so I felt like one.
**I really don’t think I failed, but see above: insane.